AVID-DIVA

Tips for Authors

This brief guide is exactly that, ie it is brief and a guide, not a comprehensive reference work, not an overwhelming tutorial, though we do hope to have a longer guide available in book form within a few months. Meantime, there are already quite a selection of "How To" books available and it might pay to ask at your local library or bookstore.

It is also not a plot guideline, for that is where the genuine talent of an author begins, with the depth of imagination and innovative thought that conjures up the storyline and characters in the first place. That is something which cannot be taught, whereas writing skills can.

So, we'll begin at the beginning - literally. And the beginning of your story, be it a short story, a novelette, or a full length novel, is the most crucial element which will ultimately decide its success or failure. Your first paragraph - your first line, even - needs to grab, hold and instill in the reader a curiosity that will take him or her onwards. In the profession, this is known as "The Hook" and if you don't bait your hook properly, you ain't gonna catch no l'il fishes!

If you want to get a better idea of what I mean, try picking a few bestsellers off the bookshop shelves and reading the first fifty words and read a few compendiums of short stories. You can also see exactly what gets a reader going if you click back to a few of my stories. Look especially at the first paragraph of Net Asset and you'll get a very good pointer as to why it has sold so well.

Intrigue, suspense, nervousness and a young lady who has clearly just poured herself into an exotic latex outfit for the first time - you know instantly that this is a brand new experience for an innocent abroad and, even without reading the cover blurb, you just know that Lianne is heading for much more than she bargained for.

So, when you start your literary masterpiece (or maybe it's a mistresspiece!) remember that you can make or break in those first few seconds. Don't waste time and effort with the likes of:-

The birds were singing in the treetops beneath a cloudless mantle of blue and the sun etched stark shadows across the driveway as Melissa drove up the driveway.

Who cares? Are the birds going to play a big part in the story that follows? Would it matter whether the action started on a sunny day, or on an evening when it was raining kittens and puppies? Ask yourself why your reader has picked up your story in the first place and try to get an element of that into it. You can mention later, further down the page, that it was hot and sunny and the birdies were twittering when Melissa first arrived, but try to use even that as an added element. See what I mean:-

Half an hour passed and still no one came. She tried the door handle for the fourth or fifth time, but it still refused, resolutely, to yield. She took a deep breath and fought back the urge to scream, for somehow she knew that this was just a test - the first of many, she knew.

The air in the room was cold and the lingering smell of leather sent a shiver of anticipation up Melissa's spine. She turned and stared at the curious harness which hung from the back of the door, the glinting chrome work in stark contrast to the darkly gleaming, polished hide of the straps.

Worst of all was the silence. The heavy oak door which separated the first stage of this new world from the mundane reality of the outside world cut off all sound and the triple glazed windows, beyond which the sun still shone as brightly as when she had first arrived, reduced the blue skied panorama beyond to the status of an unwordly silent movie.

She turned from the sight of a flock of starlings suddenly startled from the nearby treetops and walked slowly back towards that door, but this time it was not the handle that drew her across the room. Gently, hesitantly, she fingered the harness, lifting it between her two hands and trying to work out its purpose. For several seconds, the web of leather and steel remained nothing more than a complex tangle, but then, with a start, everything became shatteringly clear.

With a barely suppressed cry of shock, Melissa let the awful thing fall against the timber in a rattle of buckles and rings and took a half step back from it, eyes round in horrible understanding. It was a bridle, she could see that now, complete with steel bit and reins, but its creator had never intended it to be worn by any four legged equine. No, this gruesome device was meant for a human pony and already Melissa could feel the harsh bite of that steel bar dragging cruelly at the corners of her soft mouth.

Get the idea? Poor old Melissa is another one who is about to discover that things tend to turn out differently. Already we can anticipate the picture of our heroine trotting between the shafts, gagged by the terrible bit and at the mercy of lord alone knows who. We can't (hopefully) wait to find out more.

It isn't essential to introduce the hero/heroine and/or their main protagonists in the very first scene, but in the genre we are dealing with it is very often the best way. The first character the reader meets is generally the easiest with whom they can establish a rapport and, even better, a sympathy. In the case above, be the reader dominant or submissive by nature, whether they are necessarily into the theme of pony boys and girls, or not, they are ready either (a) to enjoy the subjugation of our heroine as though they were doing it themselves, or (b) experience her (delightful?) sufferings as the story unwinds.

We know, as does Melissa, that very soon that fearsome harness is going to be buckled onto her and now we want - need, maybe - to see it being done, for what we don't yet know is exactly how it's going to happen.

In the last paragraph, I used the word "see" and I did so advisedly and deliberately, for the reader really does need to see it, clearly, in their mind's eye as they read. There is an old maxim which is invariably trotted out in every writing class, seminar, book or article. It is "show, don't tell" and it's a lot easier to say it than to put it into use, or to describe exactly what is meant by it.

I suppose the easiest way to get the point of this across is to actually "show" you it being done, but, before I do so, there is one further point that I must stress and it is a point that inexperienced writers frequently either miss altogether, or else totally muff - dialogue.

Dialogue is not simply an interlude where two or more characters exchange a few basic lines as a break in the main narrative. Dialogue is an essential vehicle for moving the plot along, expanding individual character traits and giving the reader a real insight into what is going on in those character's heads. Or, conversely, creating an enigma in certain characters and helping them to maintain the aura that the author wishes to create and emphasise.

And don't forget, speech and accent is what gives us an insight into the people we meet in our everyday lives, so why should it be any different in fiction? Let each of your characters develop their own special style - ideally the reader should be able to "hear" who is talking, even without the addition of X said, Y said, etc, though in practice it pays to remind the reader from time to time, in order to prevent any unnecessary confusion.

Afterwards, try reading back aloud from the dialogue you have written. Better still, read into a tape recorder and play it back. If it sounds natural, you've done a good job - if you hesitate over anything, or if it sounds forced, you haven't! Try the following on for size.

Melissa stared fixedly ahead, trying to adjust her tongue under the hinged plate of this new bridle, but determined not to let them know how much discomfort it was giving her already. The thought of five or six hours with this bestial device in her mouth was too awful to contemplate, but there was little she could do about it now, she knew only too well.

The stable girl finished fiddling with the collar buckles and stepped back for Suzanna to inspect her work. The tall trainer nodded, her carmined lips twitching in approval.

`We'll work her in this rig for this morning,' she said, `and then we'll change that collar for a number three. By the end of today, I want to see that proud head forced up really high.'

`It will be, Mistress,' Ruth replied, gathering up the traing reins and passing them to the older woman. `And I'll have the blinker harness polished as well. She looks too nervous at the moment.'

Suzanna nodded. `They always are for the first few days. She'll settle quickly enough?'

`What about feed?'

`The usual starting diet. She's a sturdy enough looking filly, but there's a bit too much fat around these thighs and buttocks.' Suzanna flicked the loose end of the traces idly across Melissa's exposed flesh. It was not a hard blow, but it came quickly and unexpectedly and Melissa jumped, visibly. The trainer jerked hard on the reins and the hinged plate flew hard against the roof of the poor girl's mouth, making her snort and grunt, as much from surprise as from pain.

`Steady there, steady. Stand girl, stand.' Melissa forced herself to respond to the command and concentrated on keeping her gaze straight ahead once more.

`I'll sort out a choice of tails for her as well, Mistress.' The stable girl's matter-of-fact statement forced a shudder from Melissa, despite her best endeavours, for she had already caught a glimpse of two of the more experienced ponies and, although nothing had been said, it was only too obvious how those tails were attached.

`White, I think,' Suzanna replied. `With this lovely blonde mane, it should be a simple enough matter to bleach it to match.'

`What about her other hair?' Ruth stared pointedly at the triangular thatch between Melissa's thighs. Suzanna gave an airy shrug.

`I don't know, yet. I'll think about that this morning. I might just decide to remove it completely. That's becoming more and more popular, as you've probably noticed.'

`I'll have the necessary instruments ready for your return,' Ruth promised. Melissa closed her eyes and wondered, not for the first time, how she could have been so stupid as to let herself get into this bizarre situation. Behind her, Suzanna shook out her reins.

`Walk on,' she ordered. Lifting the heavy hoof boots, Melissa plodded dutifully towards the stable door.

And there, hopefully, is a good example of what I was talking about. Even though we've jumped a bit ahead in our story, we can still get a good idea, not only of what is coming, but what has happened in our absence. We know that Melissa is now naked, or largely naked and we know, obviously, that she has been fitted with what we can now assume is a second harness and that she is wearing some form of punitive footwear.

The two speakers give us an excellent illustration of just how they view their pony charges; Suzanna with an autocratic, authoritan air of destain and the stable girl who sees it as just a part of her job to have everything ready for her superior to be able to effect the training and transformation of the hapless pony girl.

You will also notice that so far, in neither extract, has there been any detailed physical description of any of the characters yet introduced, but you will hopefully have already fixed upon some sort of image in your own mind.

We do know, for instance, that Melissa is blonde and that she has fleshy thighs and buttocks and that Suzanna is confident that she can attain a better physical shape. As for Suzanna herself, we can assume that she is tall and powerfully built, certainly bigger than Melissa. Ruth could be almost any size, shape or colour, but I would guess that most readers would see her as being quite small, dark and probably quite strong, otherwise she would not be able to carry out her duties as a stable girl.

We have also heard that she addresses Suzanna with a due air of deference and thus the pecking order is clearly established. So now what?

Well, I could go on at great length showing more examples, but as I have already said, this is intended only as a brief guide, so I'll just cover a few basics. The first may seem to you to be an insult to your intelligence, but you would be surprised how many manuscripts I have seen over the years that prove to me that too many people do not understand the difference between "its" and "it's" and if there is anything guaranteed to get right up an editor's nose, it's reading through paragraph after paragraph of continual misuse of either or both.

"It's" is short for "it is", with the apostrophe replacing the second letter "i", as I have used it just above. "Its" is a possessive, meaning "belonging to it", ie "the horse flashed its tail and scraped its hooves over the gravel". Understand apostrophes and avoid catastrophes!

And take care with punctuation. Read back aloud as often as possible. Short pauses generally mean commas, longer pauses need full stops. Colons and semicolons should be avoided as far as possible. Their use is fraught with problems you do not need. And don't forget, the word "but" in any sentence, is always preceded by a comma.

Also, take a careful look at sentence length, as well as structure. Balance short sentences with long and medium sentences for the right "feel" and remember that action sequences are generally better if you keep sentences terse and to the point. Read a few established thriller writers and you'll see what I mean.

Finally, to paragraphs.

There is no hard and fast rule as to what is or isn't a good or ideal paragraph length. The one above, for instance, is only three words long, but it does exactly the job I wanted it to do. However, as a general rule, try to avoid having more than two, at most three, one line paragraphs in succession. It is a device which can be employed for excellent dramatic effect, but it can be overdone.

Easily.

Frequently.

Totally.

As a general rule, keep your paragraphs to a managable length, remembering always that the overall physical appearance of a page plays an important part in how much it appeals to the reader's eye and that, if you do not appeal first to the eye, you will probably not be given the opportunity to appeal to the mind.

Oh yes. One ve-ery important point. Language - of the crude variety, that is, especially as you are probably reading this with a view to writing for the Adult market. Adult it may be, but don't fall into the trap of assuming that a reader of adult material necessarily wants to be assailed by a barrage of c**nts, ar**holes, c**ks and b****cks and I haven't just used asterisks there because this article is on the wrong side of this site's explicit material warning page.

There are plenty of ways of describing parts of the human anatomy without reverting to the basic Anglo Saxon terms, at least, not in the general narrative. Obviously, in certain circumstances and for certain scenes, your characters can be very explicit. Often it would sound ludicrous if they were anything else, but make sure that any such terms are inside inverted comma quotes. Not because of censorship, but because it will make your dialogue that much better when it employs the basics and your narrative that much more readable because you have exercised a little brain power in finding an alternative way of producing the imagery that every good erotic story needs.

So there you have a few basic pointers. Good luck. Good reading and even better writing in the future. I look forward to hearing from you.

Best wishes,

Jenny Jane Pope

Apologies to those of you who mailed me expressing interest in the on-line writing seminars I want to launch. The idea is still very much alive, but time has been defeating me of late. Meantime, the good news is that one of my publishers is very keen for me to work with one of their senior editors to produce a writing guide book slanted towards would-be writers of erotica. As ever, as soon as I get any definite news, I'll post it here.

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